SalamA man wants to marry a woman but she says that she has a condition and she will marry him if he agrees to her condition. She wants to have a platonic marriage (i.e. marriage where there is not intercourse). 1.) Is this kind of marriage possible at all in islam? 2.) Does he have the obligation to give her shelter and food in such a case of a marriage?
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
The wife has no right to set a condition on her husband, when conducting the marriage contract, not to have sexual intercourse with her. This would be a void condition because it contradicts the implication of the marriage contract. However, this condition does not affect the validity of the marriage if it is concluded (with this condition being set).
Ibn Qudaamah, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said in his book Al-Mughni while listing the conditions before marriage:
“The condition that is invalidated but the contract remains valid, such as if one conditions that she (the bride) has no dowry, or the he will not spend on her, or that if he had given her any dowry, he takes it back from her, or if she conditions on him not to have sexual intercourse with her, or to practice coitus interruptus with her……” [End of quote]
Therefore, her husband has the right to have sexual intercourse with her, and the wife has the right to be provided for by her husband and other rights. However, if she refuses to answer his call to bed, then she is rebellious and disobedient. A rebellion and disobedient wife loses her right to be spent on until she obeys her husband.
Thafseer (interpretation of the Quran) by Al-Qurtubi reads: “Ibn Al-Munthir said: ‘All scholars have agreed that the husbands are obliged to spend on their wives if they are all adults (i.e., husbands and wives), except the disobedient wife who refrains to answer the call of her husband to bed…..’” [End of quote]
There is an exception to this of the disobedient wife who is pregnant, as her right upon her husband in spending on her is not invalidated due to her disobedience. Al-Qurtubi also quoted Ibn ‘Abd Al-Barr: “Whoever’s wife is disobedient after he consummated the marriage with her, then she loses her right upon her husband to be spent on, unless she is pregnant.” [End of quote]
Finally, it should be noted that the perspective of Muslim men about marriage should be based on the Sharee’ah and its noble and great objectives of marriage, and not based on newly introduced ideas and theories that contradict the Sharee’ah, its rulings, and its etiquettes.
May Allah enable everyone to do whatever He loves and is pleased with.
For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 91592.
Allah knows best.