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Several Types of ‘Uquq (1/2)

 

Several Types of ‘Uquq[1] (1/2)

1 – Causing grief and sadness to parents because of a statement or an action:

Abdullah bin Amr bin AI-‘Aa narrated that  a man came  to  the  Prophet (Peace be upon him) to  give  him  his  pledge of allegiance,  saying,  “I have come to give you my Bai’ah to perform Hijrah  (migration to Al-Madinah), However, I left behind my parents while they were crying.”

The Prophet (Peace be upon him) said:

Then go back and make them laugh as you made them cry.” (Reported by Ahmad)

Furthermore, Ibn Umar said:

Bringing tears to parents is a part of ‘Uquq and a major sin.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari)

All praise is due to Allah!  How  can anyone  bring  tears  to his  parents   when  the  Prophet (Peace be upon him) required   the  man  who wanted  to migrate  to Al-Madinah and participate  in Jihad, to go back to his parents  and bring pleasure  back into their hearts  by  his  presence,   as  he  made  them  cry  by  leaving them?  These Ahadith indicate that Allah has given parents many rights and raised high the importance of these rights. Allah   made   acts   of   Birr   with   parents    come   before participating in Jihad, as a mercy and bounty from Him.  In reality,   acts  of   Birr   are   also   a  type   of  Jihad,  for   it incorporates   using  the  body  in the  service  of  parents  and spending  money  on them,  and only those  for whom  Allah has written  all that is good and delightful  can really  satisfy and fulfill this type of Jihad.

 

2 – Practicing evil in front of Parents:

It is not allowed to practice evil in front of parents. For instance, one cannot commit such evil as abandoning prayer, drinking, listening to musical instruments, watching indecent movies, looking at indecent magazines, and other types of immoral acts in front of parents.

These acts are a type of ‘Uquq, in that they make parents angry at their children, while Allah has disallowed even saying the word Uff to them. Also, if parents agree with these acts by their children, they will earn evil deeds. Parents might be agreeable with their children in allowing these immoral acts out of love for them, and this way, one will be committing evil and luring his parents to it, leading them all to destruction. Moreover, scholars of Tafsir said that the Ayah:

And as for the boy, his parents were believers, and we feared lest he should oppress them by rebellion and disbelief.” (Surah Al-Kahf, 18:80)

Also means, We feared that their love for him would lure them to follow his religion and evil ways.[2]

 

3 – Disowning and Abandoning Parents

Anas  Al-Juhani  said  that  his  father  narrated  that  the Prophet  said:

Verily, on the Day of Resurrection, Allah has slaves to whom He will neither speak nor purify nor look at.”

He was asked, “Who are they, O Allah’s   Messenger?”   He said:

He  who  disowns  and abandons  his parents,  he who disowns  his children  and he who was granted  a favor by a people,  but he denied  their  favor  and disowned them.”  (Reported by Ahmad)

Also Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger of Allah (Peace be upon him) said:

Do not disown your parents, for he who does that becomes a Kafir (disbeliever).”   (Reported by Al-Bukhdri and Muslim)

We   should   assert that ‘Uquq  against   parents   includes throwing  them  out  of the  house  and  committing   them  to old  people’s   homes  for  the  purpose   of  abandoning   them and  avoiding   spending   on  them.   This type   forgets   and denies all the favors and kindness that they received from their parents.  However,   let it be  known  that  spending  on parents  and  being  dutiful  to  them,  especially   when   they become  old  and  weak,  are  Islamic  obligations   fulfilling which    brings    about    Allah’s     rewards,     or    otherwise punishment,  in this life and in the Hereafter.

Shaikh AI-Islam Ibn Taimiyyah  was asked about a man who was struck by poverty  and did not have the means to spend on  his  wife  and  children,  but  had  a wealthy  son.   Was it permissible for his wealthy son to spend on his father and young brothers and sisters? Ibn Taimiyyah answered:

“All the thanks and praises are due to Allah.  In this case, the son is required to spend from his wealth on his father, step mother and young brothers and sisters. Rather, if he does not spend, he will be committing ‘Uquq against  his  father,  cutting  the  relation  of  the womb  and earning Allah’s  punishment  in this life and the Hereafter. Allah has the best knowledge.”[3]

The wealth that the offspring   has, in fact belongs to his father, as this Hadith indicates:

A  man  said  to  the  Messenger   of  Allah  (Peace be upon him) that  he  had wealth  and children,  but his father  wanted  to use  some  of his wealth.  The Messenger (Peace be upon him) replied:

You and your wealth are your father’s.”   (Reported by Ibn Majah)

Also, Zur’ah bin Ibrahim said that a man came to ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him)   and said to him:

“I have an old mother who is unable to go to answer the call of nature, so I carry her on my back.  I also help her perform   ablution   while   turning   my face away from her (out of respect). Have I fulfilled my duty towards her?”  ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) said, “No.”  The man said, “Even though I carry her on my back and exert myself in her service?”   ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) said; “She used to do the same for you (when you were young) while hoping that you will live, as for you, you await when she will go away (die).”[4]

 

 

 (Continued)


[1] Qada’ud-Dain  bi-Birril- Walidain

[2] Fath ul Qadir, vol. 3, p, 304.

[3] Majmu’ Al-Fatawa, vol. 34, p. 101

[4] Birr-ul-Walidain, by Ibn Al-Jauzi.

 

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