Assalaamu alaykum. It is said that one cannot imagine life in heaven and that it is more than expectation and that one will get everything there. Now, I can imagine that my class mate, who promised to marry me but then left me and married another man without telling me reason will be my wife in heaven; can I imagine that? It is said that Prophet Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said that you will be with whom you loved in this world; and I still love her and will continue to love her; it is not in my control. Kindly advise. Thank You.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
We have already referred you to some of our fatwas which state that a woman of this worldly life will be with her husband who had married her in this life in Paradise. If she married more than one husband, then she will be with her last husband.
Therefore, thinking about the wife of another man and wishing or hoping that she would be your wife in Paradise is a waste of time and preoccupying yourself with something futile. A believer does not preoccupy himself with such a thing.
Al-Husayn ibn ‘Ali, may Allah be pleased with him, narrated that the Prophet, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said, “Allah loves important and honorable matters and hates trivial matters.” [At-Tabaraani and others – classified as saheeh (sound) by Al-Albaani]
So you should be concerned about what benefits you regarding your worldly and religious matters, and if you wish to ask, then you should ask about matters that lead to doing good deeds.
The fact that one’s imagination in this world cannot encompass what is in Paradise means that the bliss that is in Paradise cannot be perceived because as for what is in Paradise, eyes have never seen it, ears have never heard of it, and it has never crossed the mind or heart of any person, as reported in a hadeeth. However, imagining what will not be in Paradise is a futility, as we mentioned above, and there is no benefit behind it. You are more rational than to be in this state.
As regards what you mentioned that your heart is attached to that girl, then you have to endeavor to repel this. If you seek Allah’s help in this and you are sincere in doing so, then Allah will surely help you, as Allah helps those who are sincere and truthful in their endeavors.
There are means to help in the treatment of love sickness; they were mentioned by Ibn Al-Qayyim, may Allah have mercy upon him, and we have mentioned them in fatwa 84544, so please refer to it.
On the other hand, you are not sinful for what is beyond your control; you are only held accountable for the matters which you have earned and intended to do.
Allah says (what means): {And there is no blame upon you for that in which you have erred but [only for] what your hearts intended.} [Quran 33:5]
So you should be mindful of this.
In addition to this, what are you going to get from this infatuation except grief and torment in this life? How are you still attached to a girl who left you and married someone else? Also, how do you know that if you married her, you would be happy with her? Reality has proven that many people married on the basis of the illusion of love, and then their homes became weaker than the spider’s web, devoid of any stability.
Allah knows best.