Corruption between spouses is a major sin, and it is like the work of a magician. “So they learn from them what they use to separate a man from his wife.”
God made marriage a tranquility and harmony between the spouses. God Almighty said: «Among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may find tranquility in them, and He placed love and mercy between you. Indeed, in that are signs for a people who reflect.».
Among the purposes of Sharia law in marriage are: Its stability and the achievement of harmony and familiarity between the spouses… because of the great interests and great benefits that result from this.
The Wise Lawgiver was keen to strengthen the bonds of love and prevent matters that would cause discord and separation between spouses. The Messenger, may God bless him and grant him peace, said: «Treat women well…» And he said «A believing man does not let a believing woman know that if he dislikes one of her characteristics, another will approve of her» (Narrated by Al-Bukhari) And he also said «The best of you is the best to his family, and I am the best to my family».
Among the divine laws is the occurrence of marital problems in the Muslim home. Even the house of the Prophet was not spared from this due to divine rule, but God Almighty has established a wonderful approach in dealing with problems and disagreements between spouses, which is represented in His Almighty saying: {As for those whose disobedience you fear, admonish them and leave them in their beds and beat them. If they obey you, do not seek a way against them. Indeed, God is Most High, Great.}.
Corruption between spouses is a major sin, and it is like the work of a magician «They learn from them what distinguishes between a man and his wife» Separating the spouses is one of the greatest things that Satan rejoices in when he sends his squadrons, as the Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, told him in the hadith narrated by Imam Muslim, who said: «Satan places his throne on the water and then sends his envoys among the people. The closest of them to him is in station. The greatest of them will have a temptation. He will come. One of them says: I was still with so-and-so until I left him and he said such-and-such. Satan says, “No, by God, I did not do anything.” And one of them comes and says: I did not leave him until I separated him from his family. He said, bringing it closer and closer (And he sticks to it) And he says yes you are» (Narrated by Muslim).
Corruption between spouses has many forms, including:
(1) Gossiping between spouses and bad words in all other circumstances.
(2) A woman’s disobedience to her husband and her breastfeeding by mentioning his equality, or her incitement to khul’ and divorce, or demanding what she is not entitled to, or her disobedience and disobedience to him.
(3) A man spoils his wife: by mentioning her equality and bad morals, or disparaging her family and inciting him to separate from her.
(4) The father ordered his son to divorce his wife without a legitimate reason, and the son must not obey him in that because it is a sin and it is unfair to the wife. A man asked Imam Ahmed: Is my father ordering me to divorce my wife? He said: Don’t divorce her! He said: Didn’t Omar order his son Abdullah to divorce his wife? He said: Until your father is like Omar, may God be pleased with him. Sheikh Al-Islam said: Who is the one whose mother commands him to divorce his wife? He said: It is not permissible for him to divorce her, but rather he must be honorable to her! Divorcing his wife is not part of being honorable to her.
(5) The wife’s stipulation of divorcing her co-wife, whether at the time of consummation or after her marriage, makes it forbidden for both wives to ask for separation from the other because it is injustice, mistrust of God, and weakness in judgment and destiny, and he forbade it. The Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, said. «A woman should not ask for a divorce from her sister in order to make up for what is in her well-being» (Narrated by the two sheikhs).
(6) A foreign man betrayed a married woman and convinced her to file for divorce from her first husband!! If the divorce occurs, he marries her, then that is forbidden, even if the first husband was unjust to her, and the Malikis hold that the knot of treating him contrary to his intention is corrupt.
(7) The interference of a foreigner between the spouses at the time of their dispute, and the attempt to obtain a divorce, whether by the husband’s or wife’s family or others.
It is obligatory for anyone who has heard of something about the spouses’ dispute not to speak between them unless two things are confirmed:
the first: To grant him permission and be satisfied with him.
the second: To hear from both parties until the picture becomes clear, the situation is revealed, and justice and equity are achieved.
– The woman is the most corrupted family, because she is weak, overwhelmed by emotions, influenced by the word, and thus acts like a sword in the throats of men, and this is something that has been witnessed??
– Many women always seek temptation to separate themselves out of envy, jealousy, curiosity, tenderness in religion, or influence by corrupt figures.
– Both spouses must avoid gatherings of temptation and stay away from bad friends who fan the fire of temptation. If the wife is afflicted with bad people who tempt her into division or cause her to get into trouble, then she should beware of them and fulfill God’s right of connection with them as much as necessary, and do not indulge in their falsehood.
– And the one who spoils the marriage between the spouses is weak in faith, low-minded, oppresses himself, is aggressing towards others, fulfilling the desires of Satan, and God will ask him on the Day of Resurrection about his crime, and all piety is to abstain from that!!
– He must know that no matter how difficult the circumstances of the spouses are and how distressed their conditions are, such as the husband’s negligence or injustice, or the wife’s disobedience or negligence in his rights, it is best for them to remain married and have a continuous relationship with each other. Homes may be devoid of love and are mostly based on chivalry and good morals, and this is a great principle indicated by the Sharia. In fact, in the hadith: «The most hated permissible thing to God is divorce» (Narrated by Abu Dawud).
The mufti and preacher should take this principle into consideration and strive to achieve it, unless there is an obstacle in one of the spouses that prevents the continuity of treatment, such as the husband’s perversion, the wife’s mistreatment, or the occurrence of hatred between the spouses. In this case, separation is a way out???
_____________________________________
Writer: Khaled Saud Al Balaihad